Undocumented signs of aging

You often hear about wrinkles, crows feet, receding hairline...things like that, as indicators of our relentless mortal march through time, but nobody told me about the eyebrows.

I mean, come on!

I've noticed over the last few years that the hairs in my eyebrows are getting longer and longer. I used to pull them out (thinking they were just the unnatural result of standing by the microwave or something), but now I've got at least 20 that length. Pulling that many out would leave an awkward eyebrow bald spot. Not to mention the fact that they are tenacious. They hang on tight and are rather painful to extricate.

I'm not exactly fastidious, but I find myself smoothing my eyebrows out these days. I mean, normal people have morning hair, but now I've got that plus morning brow, and it's not pretty.

I haven't gone so far as to start licking my finger and slicking back the brow (I threw up a little thinking about it just now), but checking my eyebrows for renegades has now become part of the normal routine.

Stupid old age.